PLEASANTON — Just 10 days before she was killed by an angry ex-boyfriend, a Pleasanton woman described as a “devoted mother” had taken steps to protect herself and her family from harm.
Jasmine Del Mar requested and was granted a temporary restraining order against 39-year-old Sean Barry, citing an incident where he discharged a firearm after an argument in their Pleasanton home.
But Barry was undeterred.
On March 7, five days before an Alameda County judge would have decided whether to make the order permanent, Del Mar called 911 to report that Barry illegally entered her home on Saginaw Circle, armed with an AR-15 rifle. The police dispatcher heard the sound of gunshots, then Del Mar yelling, “are you kidding me,” before the line went dead, authorities said.
When law enforcement officers arrived at the home a short time later, they found Del Mar dead and Barry gone.
Police located the car driven by Barry, an Oakland resident, and followed him onto Interstate 580, where his vehicle crashed near Castro Valley. Officers who had surrounded his car found him dead inside, along with the AR-15, in what police have called a suicide.
The court paperwork from Del Mar’s restraining order lays bare the probable motive, depicting Barry as unstable and increasingly erratic.
Del Mar’s application order says that as she was leaving to go to her mother’s house after a 2022 argument between them, Barry discharged a gun from the upstairs of their home into a lower sliding glass door, shattering it.
In 2024, the couple ended their long-term relationship. Barry was supposed to move his things out of their home on April 1. But Del Mar, in court records, said that after she filed for the restraining order, he threatened her again. The Instagram message he sent contains numerous epitaphs, warns her to stay out of Oakland and is signed, “see you in hell,” the documents show.
A post on an online fundraising page called Del Mar a “devoted mother” who will be “deeply missed by so many family and friends,” whose hearts were described as “heavy.” Del Mar leaves behind a 10-year-old daughter.
If you or someone you know is struggling with feelings of depression or suicidal thoughts, the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline offers free, round-the-clock support, information and resources for help. Call or text the lifeline at 988, or see the 988lifeline.org website, where chat is available.
